Andrew Bluett-Duncan

Babette

14 August 2021

Andrew Bluett-Duncan

Director 

Babette Bluett-Duncan

Babette

I am very sorry to tell you that Babette died peacefully at home on Sunday evening. She was in the bed that we’d set up in our main room (that we live, cook, eat and talk in) and she died in the late afternoon of last Sunday 8th August. Despite the ample warning that we’d had, I’d naively thought this would lessen the blow. It didn’t seem to. She was my closest friend, the person with whom I could discuss anything, however controversial, and without fear of judgement and there existed between us a deep appreciation of the other. I suppose this is what is very often referred to as love. Her death hit me and my three children like a sledgehammer, and that is roughly where we still are, as I write this on Thursday morning. 

Has it all been misery? No, in fact early that evening, Shirley and Helen, two of Babette’s closest friends came round to “say goodbye” before the undertakers took her body away. We opened a bottle of wine and sat round enjoying memories of Babette, and there was a good deal of laughter mixed in there, along with a variety of other emotions. Josie remarked the next day that she hadn’t expected to be laughing and enjoying herself so shortly after her mum died. She’d expected everyone to just be sad and maudlin. But in fact for us there’s been a mixture of emotions, happy memories that bring laughter, tears of joy, and tears of sadness and of loss, and a few sledgehammer moments thrown in for good measure. 

I’m aware that this will have been a shock to you, especially if you’ve met her in the past or felt you knew her through her writing the updates, or maybe you knew her quite well. So, if this describes you, then thank you for joining me, my family, my colleagues, friends and neighbours in mourning the death of a woman who enriched and often challenged the lives of those she met. 

My warm regards to you.

Andrew

P.S. If you feel moved to reply to my email, may I ask you to do so here, partly and selfishly so I don’t feel obliged to reply, and I want everyone to see how she has been seen in her life.

For instance, for me she has been such a force for questioning the status quo that, if you have example you want to share of how she touched your life, I’d be delighted to hear it and suspect others will as well.

Thank you.”

263 comments

  • Rick GarrardAug 14, 2021

    I moved to Reigate from the U.S. and in order to set up house it meant piecing together tools for the kitchen. I found AoL on the high street and in the shop that day Babette. New product was being stocked so she and two other ladies were fairly busy. I was looking for cookware among other bits, and mentioned I had some experience cooking, but Babette after hearing the accent and asking me a few questions which I clearly did not answer to her satisfaction, ensured me my culinary journey was just beginning. I received a couple of gift certificates with a purchase and looked forward to the day I would return to state my appreciation and brag a bit about how much my AoL cookware and equipment had been put to use and again ask for her suggestions as to which tool should be added next. I had heard she was ill and sent a few emails – I felt very lucky to have received a reply given her health challenges. I am so deeply sorry for your family’s loss! but know that Babette left a positive impression, and passed on a passion, for which I will forever be appreciative.

  • Celia GregoryAug 14, 2021

    I am so sorry for your loss. I have never met Babette but through the weekly emails I feel as though I knew her as a friend. She was clearly an amazing lady and I am sure the happy memories you have of her will sustain you all in the coming months and years. With best wishes to the family, Celia

  • Jill JenkinAug 14, 2021

    I am so sorry that you have lost your beautiful Babette. Her story has been so full of life and hope. You will all miss her so much, and so will we. Love to you all. Jill

  • KateAug 14, 2021

    I am so sorry for you and the family, Babette was a truly amazing lady, full of life and laughter, she always found time to talk to me and we always laughed about Carcassone. I will truly miss her. My heart goes out to you Andrew and your children, take time to remember, time to laugh and time to grieve we are all here with you.

  • Jan TrimmerAug 14, 2021

    I am so sorry for your loss. I never met Babette but felt I got to know the essence of her through the posts of her ‘journey’; she was a remarkable lady. I hope in the days and weeks ahead, the heartfelt comments here will give you and your family some comfort in knowing that Babette was a much admired and loved member of our community.

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